And I am like Peter

“But when Cephas came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he stood condemned. For prior to the coming of certain men from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles, but when they came, he began to withdraw and hold himself aloof, fearing the party of the circumcision.” Galatians 2:11-12

It all started with a post on my wall. A post that I initially laughed at but was also more than a little appalled at. The thoughts that ran through my head were “What would xyz think about me and my walk.” Not what would the non-Christians in my world think, but what would the Christians I know think. I was worried about me seeming to have fallen away from God.

The struggle is to be like Peter is great. I understand a little too well what was going through his mind when he was seen with the Gentiles. “What if they question my Jewishness, what if they believe I have fallen, what if I look less holy, what will they think, will they judge me. They won’t understand.” And so he pulls away. I’ve pulled away. But I also have stayed.

I can honestly say I have been in the midst of conversations that I would rather not have been. Places I would not have chosen to go. But I go because someone needs to bear the light. The temptation to stay away is just as great as to remain. There is always the danger that instead of making a difference you will instead fall. There is always the danger that instead of making a difference, you will chose the easier seemingly more Christian path and withdraw-- and just look from a distance. Hoping that your light will shine from afar instead of going into the dark.

Walking the line is hard. It is harder than falling for the world or withdrawing from the world. It’s hard. And it is harder when you do it alone. My prayer for Mac-Town and me is to no longer go at it alone. It is so easy to lose focus and lose steam… and just float by and call it ministry to the lost. My prayer is for a deep, rocking accountability that reaches towards God and in reaching towards God reaching towards the lost. I need another woman to walk beside me. Oh I need it I need it. Pray for that for me.

We are not created to go in alone. The temptation is too great.